high net worth men vs high value men
The very controversial Kevin Samuels - relationship advisor, master misogynist, and recently deceased - spoke about the high-value man, but what he really described was a high net worth man. A high value man... is something entirely different.
What is it that makes a man valuable? Is it material wealth alone? Nobody asked me, but here’s what I think.
CLICK BELOW TO LISTEN TO THE PODCAST (6 MINS)
easter 2022 - which sins did jesus die for? (podcast)
Explore - from a different perspective - what ‘sinful’ actions led to the death of Jesus, and how those same sins may be pushing you toward a life-changing transformation as well.what ‘sinful’ actions led to the death of Jesus, and how those same sins may be pushing you toward a life-changing transformation as well.
I woke up early during Holy Week, thinking of the Easter story, and I had questions.
Namely, which of the sins in ‘Jesus died for our sins’ did Jesus die for?
Listen as I explore - from a different perspective - what ‘sinful’ actions led to the death of Jesus, and how those same sins may be pushing you toward a life-changing transformation as well.
CLICK BELOW TO LISTEN TO THE PODCAST (17 MINS)
the value of predominantly black spaces (podcast)
How do predominantly black spaces help black people develop more defined identities and more positive self-images?
Why are predominantly black spaces needed?
I finally watched ‘Colin in Black and White’ on Netflix, and young Colin’s early experiences definitely affirmed the need for safe black spaces - especially for those who have grown up in or been continuously exposed to predominantly white spaces.
A place where code-switching isn’t required, where impostor syndrome rarely rears its head, a place where one can belong instead of just fitting in.
Or, at the very least, where one can express one’s own self-concept without external influence or outside interference from those who do not have a similar experience in the world.
CLICK BELOW TO LISTEN TO THE PODCAST (6 MINS)
How Organizational Diversity Initiatives Lose the Plot
A ‘different flower’ is brought in as a transplant. She may thrive initially, but soon the toxic cultural norms of ‘one-size-fits-all’, ‘when you’re here, you’re family’, ‘it’s a lifestyle, not a job’ creep in.
Contrary to popular opinion…
Diversity is not an initiative. It is not an imperative. It is not a strategic priority.
Diversity… is a fact.
You see, nature tends toward abundance and redundancy. When nature is left to its devices, not only is there enough, there’s also a variety.
Not just one type of cloud
Or grass
Or cat
Or human.
But many. And for no more apparent or justifiable reason than survivability. Of the whole.
Nature: Better make sure we have a lot of different types of these, so if something happens to one of them, at least we’ll still have the others:
Humankind: Oh, so you mean, ‘survival of the fittest?’
Nature: Um, no. That’s not at all what I mean.
Where there is either lack or ‘excessive sameness’, there is usually an unnatural and / or external cause.
An Impact on Diversity
Decreased genetic diversity in plant crops puts the entire ecosystem at risk.
A dam constructed.
A toxic chemical introduced.
A meteor fallen from the sky.
Something happened to cut off the naturally abundant and redundant supply. And it remained. Continued. Settled in. Permanently changing the landscape.
Later, someone with short sight or memory will come along and wonder, ‘Why are there none of that particular flower here? Is this not its natural habitat?’
A committee will be convened, monies will be raised, campaigns will be launched. The naturally abundant flower will be trucked in from its natural, undisturbed habitat and planted in this place with its nearby dam or insidious chemicals.
Over time, most of the flowers will wilt, die off. A constant committee will be needed to transplant a new batch every growing season.
Annuals.
Not perennials.
And the numbers are reported out at the height of the growing season. “We have hundreds of them here, thriving!”
But no one ever stops to ask the flowers.
****
If the idea of solving the wrong problem could be summed up in a word, that word would be, ‘diversity’.
I’ve been involved in diversity initiatives at work in one way or another since I started working over 2 decades ago.
I myself was what you’d call a ‘diversity hire’. Young, inexperienced, plucked directly from the natural habitat of an Atlanta HBCU thanks to a Big 4 diversity recruiting initiative. I was a lucky flower. I got transplanted into a patch with some experienced and invested black women who ‘understood the assignment’ and took me under their individual and collective wings, giving me the ability to take root in unfamiliar terrain with the aid of familiar associations.
This is an uncommon story.
The more common one?
A ‘different flower’ is brought in as a transplant. She may thrive initially, but soon the toxic cultural norms of ‘one-size-fits-all’, ‘when you’re here, you’re family’, ‘it’s a lifestyle, not a job’ creep in. She realizes that there is no such situation as thriving here, there is: ‘conform and constrict’, ‘grin and bear it,’ or ‘wither and shrink’. Her other flower-friends, once she finds them, are usually the ones to inform her of her choices. After all, these are the choices they have made.
And so the flower makes a choice: survive, wilt… or grow feet.
In short, the story being told about organizational and corporate diversity is a narrative missing perspective. A thin plot hurtling toward a flimsy ending.
Diversity initiatives don’t just need a rewrite, they need a whole new editorial team.
20 insights about work and relationships
Some simple truths and profound mindset shifts on how you view work and interpersonal relationships.
Obvious observations about how we work and how we engage in relationships with friends, family and significant others.
Life is about relationships.
Work is one of them.
Relationships are where we learn about ourselves and how we interact with the environment and people around us.
Relationships are a form of energy exchange.
Most people (but specifically, black women) approach work and relationships from the role of supplicant.
The majority of our life from childhood to adulthood is focused on either: getting a job or a pursuing a romantic relationship.
Your identity is deeply connected to what you do for work or your relationship status.
Money is the least important factor to consider when looking for a job. Love is the least important factor to consider when looking for a life partner.
We tolerate things in our work or romantic relationships that we would never tolerate in our friendships.
Friendships are more likely to be self-defined vs. defined by culture, society or tradition.
Friendships are often our most authentic relationships.
We are also in relationship with ourselves.
The quality of our self-relationship determines the quality of our other relationships.
The quality of our self-relationship is determined by the quality of our relationships with our parents.
Our relationships with our parents serve as templates for our romantic relationships.
Our parents didn’t share much with us about their work experiences or romantic relationships.
Quitting a job or quitting a relationship can be more powerful than staying.
Healthy relationships are characterized by individual sovereignty and mutual interdependence.
Stories, symbols and images help us record and encode information about our environment and our relationships.
The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves define our reality.
I’ll be delving into each of these insights about work and relationships over the coming weeks. Get ready for some thought-provoking topics and some life-changing mindset shifts.
What winning at work should look like
The definition of work success typically focuses on what we gain from our jobs. But have you ever considered defining winning at work by starting with what losing at work might look like? What would losing at life look like? How can you expand your concepts of winning at both life and work to include having more of the things that it would kill you to lose?
What does winning, and more specifically, what does winning at work mean?
If you think of winning in the traditional, one-size-fits-all way, winning looks or sounds like:
An important title or highly visible status or position
A large amount of money, or higher-than-average salary
A larger-than-average home
Ability to purchase as many brand name or high-dollar consumables - food, car, clothes, vacations - as you want
Power and influence over others
But, I ask you to consider the concept of ‘winning’ from a different perspective - by considering what it would mean for you to lose.
What do you have in your life right now that you’d be absolutely gutted if you lost? Like, so messed up about this thing or part of your life being gone that you might not ever get over it?
Close your eyes for a few moments and let yourself imagine what that thing is and how it might feel to lose it.
Got it?
That thing - whether it was a relationship, your home, your health, or whatever you imagined…
I now want you to ask yourself this:
Is my job helping me keep this or have more of this?
Or,
is my job helping me lose this or have less of this?
Is your job adding to or taking away from what you want most?
If you answered that your job is adding more of this to your life, Congrats!
This is likely your reward for being conscious enough of your values to find the right fit job or workplace for you.
Now, for the rest of us...
If your job isn’t helping you to have more of the things in your life that you don’t want to lose, it doesn’t necessarily mean that your job is bad. But more than likely, you’ve never really stopped to ask yourself this question about your job and what it could be causing you to lose or put at risk. Maybe you didn’t know that you could or should? Maybe you didn’t even feel like you had the right to ask this question.
The truth is: almost all of us think that winning in life and winning at work is like winning a race: The first to the finish with the most medals gets to the stand highest on the podium at the end, with the whole crowd cheering from the stands.
But if life really is a race, there’s only one place that race ends, and we are all guaranteed to make it there.
It’s death.
And, if death is the finish line, why would anyone want to be first? And why are we all trying to bring along so much stuff?
When you die, even if you had a lot of stuff, a lot of really nice stuff, that stuff is not what’s going be ‘on program’ at your funeral
The people you cared for, shared with, created with, grew with, experienced triumph, tragedy and laughter with, those you helped and those who helped you will be.
And when those people go to the podium to speak, they will tell stories. They will not list off accomplishments or titles or bank account balances, (what a terrible funeral that would be!) but stories.
Have you ever listened to a friend tell a really good story about you?
Here’s a clip from one of my favorite movies, ‘Death Proof’ (total coincidence, I promise), where Rosario Dawson’s character Abernathy is telling a story about Zoe Bell, aka, ‘Zoe the Cat’. (Warning: Language)
Hearing yourself as the main character in a story told by someone who likes you and gets you, is pretty cool. You get to see yourself from a different perspective. You get to see what people value most about you. You get a look at yourself in an accurate mirror.
I think we can agree by now that accomplishments and stuff alone aren’t enough to consider yourself a winner at life or at work.
So, if your work is giving you the chance to collect lots of stuff, but isn’t also giving you the chance to have more of what you value most, nor is it giving you the chance to create or hear the stories you want to hear about yourself... then what is it there for? And how can you move from just accomplishing or amassing to actually winning?
1,001 black women’s stories
My goal of recording 1,001 black women’s life stories was inspired by my grandmother, but I won’t be able to make ‘herstory’ happen without your help.
At the start of this year, one of the items I plotted and prioritized on my Life Value Map was my goal to record the stories of 1,001 black women.
The desire came as a result of having taken the time to record a series of life story interviews with my grandmother in the summer of 2020.
The experience was not only profoundly revelatory for me, it also strengthened the bond between me and my grandma. This was our special thing. Something only we shared and I felt as honored to listen as she felt to be seen and heard.
Later in the year, I was introduced to the book ‘But Some of Us Are Brave’ a collection of womanist - aka, black feminist - essays from a variety of black woman scholars and writers. One such essay, entitled, ‘Debunking Sapphire: Toward a Non-Racist and Non-Sexist Social Science’ by Patricia Bell-Scott, highlighted the lack of ‘everyday black women’s stories’ in the overall study of black women and black women’s histories.
“Proponents… have concentrated almost exclusively on the lives of nationally known Black women. Implicit in this “life and times” approach is a class bias. The prevailing or resulting impression is that Black working-class or low-income women are inconsequential to the American experience. All this is not to say that the lives of prominent Black women are not important; however, their lives represent only a few of the least generalizable circumstances that Black women have experienced. Most Black women have not been able to rise to prominence.”
The essay was written in 1977, the same year I was born. And 43 years after its writing, I can see that there’s still a lack of celebration of the ‘everywoman’s’ story in black media and literature, even in black families.
Much of the details of my womenfolk’s stories were never shared with me, but within them are the seeds of my own story. Any path that I chart to success or other destinations will be a continuation of their stories, but what I’ve often been encouraged to do is to look outside of my family and latch on to the stories of prominent or notorious black women as either templates for me to follow or emulate, or cautionary tales on what I should avoid.
It wasn’t until I was able to hear my grandma’s stories about her upbringing and values, her struggles and sorrows, her triumphs and adventures, that I could truly give a name to some of the shadow or not-fully-visible parts of myself and my own story. My process of self-actualization (i.e., becoming my authentic self) and self-definition would be unnecessarily difficult or even impossible if I did not ‘go back and fetch it’.
And this experience of loving compassion for another’s story leading to loving compassion for one’s own story is the experience I want to share with as many other black women as possible.
The reason for the goal specifically being 1,001 is two-fold:
It seemed a number that was big enough to scare me a little, while still being achievable, and
It was inspired by the legendary heroine of 1,001 Arabian Nights, Scheherazade. A woman who literally saved her own life through her storytelling.
So! To accomplish this slightly-scary-but-still-achievable goal, I need your help.
I’m asking for you to help me achieve this goal by recording the life story of an elder black woman family member (preferably, for the reasons stated above) or any black woman that you know and would be willing to interview, listen to and honor via this act of love.
I understand that the telling of one’s personal story is an intimate or even private event, so I won’t ask for you to share the recorded stories with me - though you are certainly welcome to! - instead, I will measure success or progress towards this goal by the number of ‘story pledges’ I receive.
Not a perfect metric, but it’s one that respects the process more than the goal.
For all those who take this pledge, I will provide support in the form of:
Step-by-step instructions and guides on how to prepare for the recording, what questions to ask, and how to interview your subject(s),
Guidance on how to use the StoryCorps app or site as a completely free tool for recording your interview AND a way to have your story archived at The Library of Congress!
My personal participation as an interviewer or facilitator, if you would like your own story heard and recorded, or if you feel like you could use an unrelated person to help bring out the story of a close relative (full disclosure: there will be a small fee to cover my opportunity cost)
So - will you help me reach my goal?
Declaration of Self: How to Create Your Personal Manifesto
Create your own personal manifesto, aka, Declaration of Self. A method for using popular personality tests to make a statement about who you are and why you’re here. Let the world know what your ‘big why is.
I recently completed a 5-day self-directed, self-clarity exercise.
Each day, I took one of the following self-assessments designed to reveal insights about my personality and natural talents:
Natal chart
Typefinder
Enneagram
Life Values Inventory
StrengthsFinder
On the 6th day, I did a final self-clarity exercise where I perused the Ultimate list of Archetypes and selected the top 3 archetypes that fit me best.
On the 7th day… I rested. :)
Mainly because at the end of all of that self assessing, I was swimming in self-information.
And… I’m not that strong of a swimmer.
So - I set out to create something that would let me assemble all of this self-information into a statement I could actually USE to keep myself focused and afloat in times of uncertainty, difficulty or great change.
The result: My Declaration of Self.
It’s like my personal manifesto or mission statement - a declaration to myself and to the world of WHO I AM and WHY I’M HERE.
Here’s how I crafted it.
How I Created My Personal Manifesto, aka, MY Declaration of Self
Based on what I know of each of the self-assessments and what they were designed to tell me about myself - for instance, the Enneagram tells me about my ego and how I face challenges; the ascendant sign in my natal chart tells me what role others usually see me as playing - I drafted the template below.
Each self-assessment provided a result that was very similar to an archetype or that could be translated into an archetype.
WHAT IS AN ARCHETYPE?
I like to think of an archetype as a symbol or a character. Archetypes represent known patterns of behavior, a set of personal characteristics that can be summed up in a single word.
Watch MY IGTV VIDEO on ‘Defining Yourself with Archetypes’ for more on how I define and use archetypes.
By translating my assessment results into corresponding archetypes, I was able to come up with a list of words that could be plugged into my templated statement, mad-libs style.
Finding the Archetypes for my natal chart signs and houses
To get the zodiac sign archetypes for my Sun, Ascendant, North Node, South Node and Moon signs, I relied on Kathryn Hocking’s 12 Archetypes of the Zodiac. You can find it here: https://kathrynhocking.com/the-12-archetypes-of-the-zodiac/
To get the house meanings for my North and South Nodes, I used the Zodiac House meanings from Labyrinthos. You can find them here: https://labyrinthos.co/blogs/astrology-horoscope-zodiac-signs/tagged/houses
The final outcome was my personal Declaration of Self:
create Your Own personal manifesto
The 5 Self-Assessments I Do Before Goal-Setting
Before you can write your life story, you have to get to know your main character really, really well. Personality assessments provide a consistent, reliable way to get to know yourself before you make a major life change or take a big leap.
Every wise explorer carries something to navigate by.
Especially if what you’re exploring is yourself.
Whenever I’m planning to make a major shift or a significant life change, I carve out time for a little self-exploration beforehand.
Why?
When I’m do something that doesn’t look like it makes sense to others, I have to be pretty sure of myself and the ‘big whys’ behind my big leap or big shift.
A few of the ‘senseless’ things I’ve done in the past:
Quit my ‘good corporate job’ as a management consultant to invest in real estate
Quit my ‘good corporate job’ as an IT project manager to become a freelance writer
Quit my ‘good corporate job’ as a content strategist to move to Spain and teach English
And I recently quit my ‘good corporate job’ to start following my purpose.
After 4 years of working in an environment that tested my self-confidence and my commitment to my personal values, I knew I needed to spend some time getting reacquainted with myself without the constant stress and anxiety that comes with being in a situation or environment that is just not the right fit.
I turned to several personality assessments - some I’d taken before, some I hadn’t - to help me dig deep and really put some effort into my answers to the questions:
‘Who Am I?’
and,
‘Why Am I Here?’
Answering these questions allow me to enter my life planning or goal-setting process with clarity. Not just clarity about what I want - i.e., what I want to accomplish, what I want to have more of, what I want to have less of - but clarity about who I am now, who I am becoming, and what will help me bridge the gap between the two.
Having the answers to these questions gives me the essential ingredients I need to begin writing my life story. To assume the role of the hero in my own story. To stop waiting for external achievement, relationship or reward to make me feel complete or valued.
I believe that each of us was sent to the world at the exact time we were born because we have a mission to complete. Some call that mission destiny, others call it purpose. But whatever you call it, it’s this driving force that will really help us feel fulfilled in life versus only feeling accomplished.
To make sure I get the maximum value out of these personality assessments, I developed a process of extracting the most meaningful bits of each assessment and using them as inputs to:
Defining my life story’s main character
Creating the outline for my life story
As with life, it’s not just about the results of the test, but what you do with those results that matters most.
Below are the 5 personality assessments I use before I begin life planning or goal-setting. For more details on how I use each assessment, and how I create my Declaration of Self and my Life Value Map from the results, click each link to explore further.
My 5 Go-To Self-Assessments:
Natal chart
Typefinder (aka, Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator)
Enneagram
Life Values Inventory
StrengthsFinder
The Life Planning Outputs I Create from My Self-Assessments:
Declaration of Self
Life Value Map
New Year, New Story!
Goals motivate. But stories inspire and transform. So why are we not using stories instead of goals when it comes to New Year’s planning?
New year, new me!
It’s a phrase we hear a lot at the start of a new calendar year. What it means: we’re ready to summon the newest and best version of ourselves to begin the year ahead. The funny thing is, the ‘new me’ that we think of, aka, the evolved self, is usually revealed at the end of a journey, not at the start of one.
So, I think the more fitting proclamation would be: New year, new story!
Your story is the process of transformation, aka, the journey, that brings about the new you.
Goals motivate us. Goals give us something to strive for. An accomplishment to go after. But stories inspire us. Stories give us something to live by. Stories transform us and provide meaning.
So, why are we not writing stories at the start of a new year instead of goals?
The good news is: When it comes to planning your year, or your life, you can write pretty much whatever story you like...
... as long as you know how.
Ready to Write your Story?
Want a peek at how I use stories for New Year’s goal-setting? Click below to learn more about my 4-step process.
How I Use Stories for Personal Goal-Setting and Life Planning
Using Stories for Goal-Setting and Life Planning: Write, Then Edit
Your life story is being written every day. The habits and guiding principles you adopt will determine how well your story turns out. But. don’t worry, you can always work things out when it’s time to edit.
Writing Your Life story isn’t just about being inspired.
Crafting your life story chapter by chapter takes commitment to a process, or at least, to a set of guiding principles or habits. Much of story-writing or storytelling involves following a process that transforms the artist into a craftsman.
I’m writing the story of my life each and every day. The quality of my life story will largely be determined by the guiding principles I follow and the habits I develop. These principles and habits should be organic enough to allow me to respond to what’s happening in the moment, but also structured enough to make sure I don’t lose sight of my story.
Some of My Guiding Life Principles
· Flexibility
· Experimentation
· Experiences over possessions
· Belonging is better than fitting in
Some of My Life Habits
· Regular self-reflection
· Time spent in nature
· Travel
Editing My Story
You can’t edit a story while you’re writing it.
Writing requires you to be present in the moment. Editing is when you have time to analyze, critique, review and adjust. Editing helps refine the initial draft of your life story into a finished product that has greater clarity and meaning.
When I take time out for self-reflection and self-development, I’m editing my life story. As I’m writing my story – living each day, going on adventures, encountering success and failure – I’m in the middle of it all, I’m too close, too emotionally involved in the events that are unfolding to assess them accurately in the moment.
I have to occasionally pause and reflect on everything that’s happened to put it in context, and determine what adjustments need to be made. Regular self-reflection allows me to mine the newly-written parts of my life story for jewels that I can use to keep creating better and better storylines.
My Daily Self-Reflection Practices
I use some combination of the following on a daily basis:
writing,
voice notes,
meditation,
quiet thinking,
listening to self-development podcasts
reading an essay or listening to speeches (e.g., Ted talks)]
So, let’s recap the steps to taking a story-based approach to goal-setting:
While it’s a bit more detailed than traditional goal-setting, I think that the outcome of the story-based approach is much more meaningful and makes me way more excited to pursue my goals.
Next, I’ll share the steps I use to turn my Life Value Map into a ‘neverending story’ that makes me feel like an overachiever even when I don’t accomplish any of the goals I originally set.
Using Stories for Goal-Setting and Life Planning: Outlining the Plot
You’re almost ready to write your life story. An outline of your goals, desires, needs and dreams is the perfect map to take along with you on your journey. Learn how to create your own personalized Life Value Map that will motivate you and keep you excited about each new phase of your life’s journey.
Now, it’s finally time to begin plotting the story – what is the quest that the main character will go on? What will she encounter on her journey? What dangers and perils await her?
This step is similar to traditional goal-setting, but it’s placed within the context of an overarching life story.
To begin outlining my life story’s plot, I start by asking myself the following questions.
Questions for Outlining My Life Story
What do I want?
Who do I want to be?
What change do I want to see in myself? In the world?
Who do I want to help?
What problem(s) do I want to solve / fix? What wrongs do I want to right?
What do I want to leave behind?
The Powerful Woman Wheel
I created the Powerful Woman Wheel as a way to define the areas of life that a powerful black woman (versus a strong black woman) would focus on. Since, ‘becoming a powerful woman’ is one of the key quests of my life story, I use the Powerful Woman Wheel to help define the main categories of my life story.
Who / what is going to help me?
Mentors, role modes
Right associations
Centering practices / beliefs (big why)
Who / what is going to stop me?
Shadow self
Vices
Unresolved trauma responses; attachment issues
Wrong associations
What lesson(s) do I want to learn?
Before my story is finished, I want to be able to say:
I’ve mastered…
I’ve studied…
I’ve learned…
I know something about…
How far can I go?
A MORE SIMPLE METHOD: Instead of answering all of the questions above, I can draft a pretty good life story outline by asking myself, ‘How do I feed my ‘X'-factors’ ?’ My X-factors are the personal archetypes that I uncovered while defining my main character. They are also included in my Declaration of Self.
The Life Value Map
I wanted a way to keep my answers to the life story outline questions close at hand. Something that would act as a living ‘map’ that I could refer to regularly and that I could quickly and easily add new quests, adventures and story elements to over time.
Borrowing from agile project management, the Life Value Map is like a backlog of all the things I want to do in life - a running list of my goals, dreams and visions - organized in a kanban board layout.
I use the categories from the Powerful Woman Wheel as my column headers and I add the answers to the life story outline questions under the relevant column(s).
I prefer to keep my life value map in a digital project management tool like Trello or Asana. This makes it accessible anytime and anywhere. Which means I can always use it to add new items to my life story outline.
Next: Write, then Edit
Using Stories for Goal-Setting and Life Planning: Understanding the Backstory
Every hero has an origin story. When crafting your life story, you must understand what has brought your main character to this moment. What parts of your past must be identified and understood before you can create the future you desire?
After defining my story’s main character – her traits, qualities, strengths and struggles, the next step to crafting my personal story is to define my main character’s backstory.
That is, what are the most recent and / or the most relevant events that have occurred in my main character’s life? What brought the main character to this moment, to the current situation or state of affairs?
For this, I took a day over winter break and did my own year-end-review. I made a written list of all of the major or meaningful moments from the past year that I could remember. I scrolled through social media posts and pictures on my phone to help me recall some of the moments I’d forgotten.
I probably could have done this exercise in less than a day, but I allowed extra time for sentimentality and emotional segues and side roads I tend to wander down when reflecting on the past.
Storytelling and Letter-Writing as Backstory Exercises
Earlier in the year, I’d also done a couple of storytelling exercises that helped me clarify my backstory.
One was a series of recorded interviews with my grandmother. By listening to her stories, I could see how my own life story was a continuation of hers and how much I could draw from her story to help shape my own.
[NEW YORK TIMES Article: Record and Share Your Family History in 5 Steps ]
The second was a letter-writing exercise in the book, ‘Write Yourself Into Your Dreams’. The book guides its readers through a process for unpacking unhealed trauma and unresolved inner conflict with one’s parents.
Though I was initially skeptical of the process, it was surprisingly impactful and helped me to offload some emotional baggage that the main character of my soon-to-be-written life story did not need to be carrying around.
[PSYCHOLOGY TODAY Article: Transactional Writing: Letters That Heal]
[SNAILED WITH LOVE: Letter Writing to Create Connections]
